This is my husbands hand:
Yep, my husband wears fake nails! I don’t know what’s gotten into him lately. This is the second time in the last 6 months that he’s been overcome with the sudden desire to have fake nails.
The first time, Chris was visiting me while I was working in the ER. He offered to go to my favorite coffee shop- Tim Hortons- to get me a drink. Naturally I said yes, I never say no to either their coffee or their Ice Caps. I love Ice Caps. He didn’t have any money so I gave him $20. I think he was going to get some drinks for some of my co-workers as well, our treat.
Two hours later my ever wandering husband returned. He tapped me on the shoulder while I was with a patient and they jammed his right hand into my face. “See what I did?” All excited.
“You… You have fake nails? Man that looks weird.”
“Yeah, I went to check out that place at the strip mall Just Nails. They weren’t busy so I got my nails done.”
“You did, did you” Still stunned. My co-workers are laughing.
“I had one lady doing my nails and two gave me a foot massage and a pedicure.”
“You got a pedicure too?” (What the heck is going on?) “How much did all of this cost?”
“$20 bucks”
“Let me see if I’ve got this right: You had three women working on you for $20? Just what kind of massage did you say you got?” I’m laughing picturing this, but he’s so excited about his first pedicure that he doesn’t realize how funny this situation has become.
“That’s right and I really liked the pedicure. I want to get another one soon.”
“I can’t believe you have fake nails!” Staring in a stunned manner at his oddly feminine looking hand.
“Well you know I was trying to figure out a way to make my nails harder for guitar playing. Bruce Cockburn (a famous Canadian Musician) supposedly puts crazy glue on his nails to make them harder and a lot of serious guitarists use fake nails.”
This explains everything. My husband hasn’t suddenly become fascinated with fake nails, manicures and pedicures, well maybe a little he only did this for his guitar playing. It is true that many famous guitarists use various methods including fake nails to give them more picking strength.
That was his first experience with fake nails.
The nails are only on his right hand, which makes it look even stranger. The first set of nails he had were really thick and while they did give him the nail strength he was looking for while playing guitar, they looked just terrible. He also kept them on for about three months and they got uglier as time went by. The second set of nails are much thinner and more natural looking. Well, sorta.
When he approached me earlier this afternoon mentioning that he wanted to get fake nails again I wasn’t thrilled. The first ones not only looked weird but they also felt disgusting when he’d touch me. Yuck. I tried to dissuade him by reminding him we have a big family wedding to go to next weekend. “Your going to have fake nails at Petra’s wedding?”
My attempts at stalling the inevitable didn’t work and off he went to get his “new” nails. They don’t feel quite as odd when he touches my skin, so that’s good, but damn, they still look odd!
Any male readers out there experiment with fake nails? or enjoy a pedicure every now and then?
Ladies, do you have any stories to tell about your man doing something distinctly feminine?
I don’t think my roomie Ed has fake nails, but I’m not sure. I’ll have to ask him. In the meantime, why don’t you visit Ed at Parenting Toys and see his post “I remember when …” and add some of your childhood memories to his post?
Paul McCartney does this also. But I think he only wears them on the fingers he actually uses for his guitar playing which may look even odder than your husbands — but at least he’s in good company. If the lingerie wearing begins – that’s when you might want to get concerned.
At least he gets them for the guitar and not for some secret hidden identity. lol! I am with you though, would kinda sorta give me the heebe geeeeebies for a guy to touch me with nails on.
I got the nails thank you very much, me no need you rubbing/scratching my back.
Woot, you are ahoot.
Brandi 😀
My brother Jack is a guitarist and I was blown away when I saw him come home with a set of fake nails. He went on to tell me how many other guitarists did this as well, but it still looked weird.
Then his wife got a look at them. She gave him a month. They started looking weird in two weeks. Turns out he was starting to get fungus under a few of the nails. In getting them off, he lost his thumbnail and his middle nail. It was several hundred dollars of antibiotics and prescription anti-fungal meds until his nails returned to normal. He couldn’t play while he healed, and lost a good job in Branson, MO.
I think it’s great that your husband is embracing his inner metrosexual! 🙂
I see you just left a comment on my site. What does it say about us that we are up at this hour trying to find Matt? 🙂
Omgosh! That’s too funny! The only thing I can say that my husband has done that was oddly feminine to me was let the old lady at a mall kiosk sell him skin care products. Not just once, he kept going back and now has the ENTIRE line!!
I had no idea where he was getting this stuff, I just kept seeing new stuff in the closet so I assumed he was getting it from walmart or something. When the same old lady stopped me and gave me a sample scrub on my arm, I recognized the line and found out that he spent almost $200 on all of it!!
In my husbands defense… he doesn’t use it. Any of it. It’s just sitting in the closet looking pretty.
At least your husband has a method to his madness! 🙂
He needs counseling. Hah. That is truly among the strangest things I have seen.
Man. At first I thought I was reading about a guy who was going to end up wearing ladies’ underwear!!!
Whew!
I had fake nails once and ripped one off playing basketball. That wasn’t fun at all! I hope his don’t come off with vigorous guatar playing! :o)
I was dropping by to find Matt and wow…I had no idea guitarists did this. A new one on me!
I’m looking for Matt, but I certainly learned a lot about guitarists at this blog. And about equal rights for men. (Women don’t want them to have equal rights to some things)
Had no idea that musicians did this. Interesting though, his nails look better than mine. :p
You are correct, I don’t wear fake nails, but I do get them done a couple of times of year. No color or gloss, just trying to keep them neat.
My step father use to put clear nail polish on,and he was a womanizer.
Honestly, I can see his point for wanting to have fake nails to help with his guitar playing, especially if he’s a finger picker. Although, it wouldn’t make any sense if he got them done on his left hand because it would only interfere with his guitar playing. Trust me. Playing guitar with long nails sucks. I’ve never had fake nails, but I have a bad habit of letting my nails grow for a while before I cut them.
A lot of people say it looks slightly feminine. All I have to say to that is “Eh, at least they’re not red!”
I think they look good. Im a boy and I have fake nails their about an inch long. I think theres nothing wrong with taking care of yourself. Its not grilie i think people are to sexist. I believe its okay for you to do something as long as it doesnt hurt others are yourself. I think i look good and my friends do to. Many times people dont know Im a boy ( I have a twin thats why).
It’s not as weird as it might seem, when you’re doing it for something you love. I am a fingerstyle guitarist and my index and middle fingernails got damaged 5 years ago at a gig (caught on someone’s trousers who was jumpng about and got ripped up from the nail bed) and they haven’t grown properly since. They constantly break and split of their own accord, so I’m looking to get fake nails myself. Only thing is that I don’t think normal, decorative nails are strong enough for guitar playing and so I have to try and do some research into it. I’ve heard that my idol, John Butler of The John Butler Trio fame, uses acrylic nails. I’ve also heard that coating fake nails in super glue strengthens them enough. But anyway, the point is that it’s no different from a professional swimmer shaving all his body hair, it helps us do our thing… and looks a bit gay.
Luigi
I don’t see what the big deal is. It is amazing what we will accept as a society and what we won’t. Supposedly it is ok for gays to marry, divorce is rampant, 3000 abortions a day. A guy wearing fake nails is no big deal! Now to be honest I think his hand looks a little masculine, so for me I don’t think the nails work as much. Maybe if they were longer? It really is no big deal. Polish shouldn’t be a big deal either, we both have nails. Why do women get to wear nail polish and I can’t? Yes I am a man, in my 30s and I just started wearing acrylic nails. I don’t care what anyone thinks! I have admittedly feminine looking hands and I think my nails look great. I am happy and that is all that matters! I don’t treat people bad, I don’t steal, I have never gotten a divorce, or created an unwanted child, I am very moral, have great values, etc. Probably why I am not married! LOL That is a topic for another day, point is guys can do whatever as long as it looks good. Especially hands, when our hands are equal!